First, let me explain what the Adoption Triad is. The Adoption Triad refers to the birthfamily, adoptive family, and adopted child. This relationship has many levels depending on the circumstances surrounding the adoption. As we’ve mentioned in the past, our pending adoption (if it goes through) will be an open adoption. That means we will exchange pictures and letters and will visit the birthfamily a few times a year.
In addition, an open adoption frequently means that the adoptive parents have received a lot of information about the birthfamily. As in all relationships, there is a level of trust that builds between a birthfamily and an adoptive family. There is a certain level of respect that we extend to the birthfamily and that we expect from them. In this vain, there are certain questions about the birthfamily that we may not answer or for which we may give a generic answer, out of respect for the birthfamily.
In addition, there are certain things that all parents want to share with their children before telling anyone else. This is no different for adoptive parents. There are certain aspects of an adopted child’s birthfamily, that need to be shared with the child before other people know. Also, there may be certain things that we will leave up to the child to tell others because we feel that it is their decision how and when to share.
So, if you ask us a question and you receive a somewhat generic response, it might be because we feel that it is not something we should share with others, out of respect for both the birthfamily and our adopted child.